India

I am a promoter of solo travel and on more than one occasion I have unveiled my love and the discovery for the solitary travels. It’s enough to go on a network to understand how this way to travel regarded since years ago as a madness, is now in vogue and it became a trend.

But it is undeniable that traveling alone for a woman is more difficult than it may be for a man, especially if it is being done in certain Countries.

Sais that, I must say that a trip to India, especially at the beginning, is certainly not relaxing for anyone, man or woman: public transports often overwhelmed, practically non-existent courtesy distance, no rules, chaos, pure-mindedness, in short, a true odyssey!

Before I came to India I traveled to several countries around the world, but never like this time I felt I had to learn everything from scratch. I was aware of it for the first time when I started collecting information on the net and talking to people who had already traveled to India. I had confirmation when the hostel I would spend the first night in Delhi sent me an email with the subject: “Avoid Scams”.

“Scams” and whacks of all kinds give to the unsuspecting tourists, who if not prepared, risk really often to fall int the trap. The techniques used by the Indians are the smartest, I must say that they are really good and persuasive and you have to be careful not to be tempted especially in big cities:

they may say that the booking office you are looking for is no longer there, it has come a few months ago and they will ask you to accompany you to the new one;
you will find nice people, there are a lot of them, but unfortunately, at first, you will probably attract people who will be kind, but in the end, they will ask you something or worse they might want to cheat on you. When I arrived in Delhi a friend of the hostel’s friend asked me questions and became available to accompany me to a market where I wanted to go. I can only say that without even knowing how, I found myself on a tuk-tuk with him and a friend of him brought me exactly to the place I read about in various posts, a fake travel agency that sells non-existing packages or a real one for a triple price. All this because, according to them, on the days when I was thinking of traveling there would be a festival and I would not be able to find any room anywhere! When I told them I knew it was a scam they were astonished and silent and they brought me back to my hostel!
Even when they know how to get to a certain place, Indian people don’t know how to give the right directions, but even worse, even when they have no idea about the place you are looking for, they will still tell you directions that obviously will not bring you to your destination! This behavior created me few problems during my trip. In addition, as if that was not enough, if you ask for a confirmation they will always say yes! I was together with two French women in a very absurd situation, for a series of misunderstandings, we lost the only train that would take us to Khajuraho, and so we had to take a train that would take us halfway, arriving at the destination at 3 am. One of my biggest worries about traveling at night was: How can you recognize your stop if yours is not at the end? Outside everything is dark, there is no illumination or very little, onside the train everyone is asleep, how to do it? Until then I had always been lucky because my destinations were always been the last ones. But that night, unfortunately, it seemed all damn complicated. And so we spent all night, every stop after 3 am, opening the exit door, going out to see if it was our and starting again. At some point, we asked a woman who was climbing the train if that was our stop and she said yes, and it was enough to ask her a couple of checkpoints to understand that she would respond yes or no in any case.
I consider myself a very polite, sunny and polite person, and this aspect of my character has always been appreciated and it never created any problems. Even my Italian being and therefore my particular conception of relationships has never caused any problems; even in Japan, a culture far away from mine, I knew the behavioral rules were quite different, so I behaved as a consequence, this as a form of respect for that culture. But I’ve also been hugging the Japanese with whom I came in, this to show them what my culture was like. Smiling, being kind was a pleasure in a Country where cordiality and kindness are part of that culture, of their being. In India, however, the speech changes, here, smiles, kindness, or simply be nice can be soon badly or wrongly interpreted. I have been warned several times by Indian friends in this regard. It must be assumed that the majority of Indians have a special regard for foreign women, the idea is that the foreign women are easy girls. We should also consider another aspect, in particular, the condition of women in India, overall in Rajasthan. Women are here considered inferior to men, they have no equal rights, they’re not allowed (or it’s not good considered) to talk to men or to go around alone; excluding large cities, it is rare to see Indian women go out alone, it will be much more likely to see them in the company of husband and children. While you will see many groups of men in restaurants, city streets, and so on. An Indian woman, especially in Rajasthan, would never be friendly as we can be, and this, unfortunately, is badly interpreted. So, when you start talking with Indian men, they’ll probably ask you to go out with them, know their families, and give them your phone number!
The tourist in India is seen as a person with much economic availability and this conviction is reflected in many things. Arrived at Jaipur by bus, the guy who handed over the luggage didn’t want to deliver mine unless I paid him a fee. I refused, but obviously not for the amount of rupees itself, but for the principle, because I’m sure that if I wasn’t a foreigner, but above all if I was a man, that boy would not have decided to extort that money.
Often, on coaches and trains, there are more men than women. On some occasions, on the part of the train where I was, there were only men, and other times I was the only foreigner and traveler. At first, these aspects can destabilize or worry, but soon you will understand that some of the aspects we are worried are also misunderstood. It’s true, Indian men look at you, but in most cases, is the only thing they will do it together with talk about you with your friends!

When India will stop scaring you and you learn how to behave in the right way and how to deal with this Country, is in that moment, that also embarrassing situations, like waking up in the morning on a sleeper class nightclub with guys and men watching you like an alien, can even make you laugh at the situation you are in.

When you are no longer a beginner, when you show yourself self-confident, and you start to live actively the place where you are traveling, by putting aside doubts and fears, it’s then that you will attract most of the kind and willing people to help you, it’s then that the trip will be really interesting.

What is certain is that if you successfully pass a trip to this wonderful Country you will be able to travel anywhere in the world (of course I do not mean those places affected by wars or the like) without problems!

A trip to this wonderful Country will change you without a doubt, and if you have the right approach, you meet a lot of people ready to help you, kind and thoughtful.

The world is a place less dangerous than one can think of and if it is true that trusting is good but not trusting is better, trusting people and opening to them is one of the best things you can do and that can happen to you!